…even if I was afraid it never would. I’ve seen a profile for someone on match.com whom I simply *must* know. I don’t even care if I get to date the guy (well, okay, I DO care, but I’m not going to get my panties in a twist about it), but just want to know who he is.

I’m smiling. Like a LOT. Can’t recall the last time I reacted quite this much to someone.

Yeowsers. Off to bed. “Class” has to wait for another day.

Okay, I think it’s time to start a running list of statements in men’s profiles on match that make me snicker. Today’s beaut is a guy who’s looking for:

Someone that believes with convection yet has a very open mind and not afraid to express it.

Well, hallelujah, and bake me a cake!

Yes, I’m talking about class, you know, like castes? Lots on my mind about this today, so I might as well blog it. Along with that, I might just add a category called “Snotty Bitch.”

More to come…

Thanks (again) to Margi.

By the way, the guy from the other day (who made the comment about exes) did write me back, with good things to say. Besides that, I’m finding with each email, he’s pretty bright, AND HE CAN WRITE. Anyone who can write well has a huge leg up where I’m concerned.

That brings me to my next bit of snicker. Match.com has a passive-aggressive means of contacting someone called “sending them a wink.” IOW, match tells them that you *might* be interested, but apparently not enough (or you’re not gutsy enough) to send an honest-to-god email. Here’s part of the profile from someone who just “winked” at me:

favorite hot spots:
I have all ways liked going to a good restraint and a movie.

For the record, I prefer my restraints at home. *At* the movies, my hands must be free for soda, popcorn, sweetarts, and junior mints. A girl has to have her priorities. But hey, whatever turns you on, mister.

Maya was nursing as I read that profile, and my snort was loud enough she pulled off and gave me quite a *look*. I’m sending him the “thanks, but no thanks” passive reply…gee, ya think?

My daughter hit nine months today, so we’ve been busy doing the doctor thing, and my thoughts have more been on her instead of the topics that fit here. Good lord, she is so freakin’ tiny!

While at the doctor’s office, my pediatrician noticed a “hip click” on Maya’s left side. We’re being referred to an orthapedist for further checking, because this can be indicative of hip dysplasia. Being the good (or is that neurotic?) mom that I am, I researched infant hip dysplasia as soon as I got home. YIKES.

I pray that this is really nothing, and thank god that I’m shelling out the large payments monthly for a good health insurance plan. Even if I’m spending more monthly than I might have out of pocket…when things like this arise, there’s no question about whether to go to the specialist. We just go.

Your IQ Is 135

Your Logical Intelligence is Genius Your Verbal Intelligence is Genius Your Mathematical Intelligence is Genius Your General Knowledge is Exceptional

Link swiped from Margi.

Funny thing is…when I’ve taken some (slightly, anyway) longer tests, I’ve gotten about the same numeric result. Not quite MENSA, but I’m okay with that. I’m just not *that* into chess, ya know?

PLEASE. FTLOG, put on some bike shorts! Barring that, please have your spotter stand at the foot of the weight bench instead of the head while you do chest presses.

There have been a few “winks” (match.com’s wussy way of letting someone know you’re interested without actually throwing yourself out there), but those have mostly been of the “what the hell are you thinking writing to me; did you only look at photos???” variety. Fortunately, match also provides a single button to click that responds with a (in their words) “polite thanks, but no thanks.”

Got Maya to bed, and found this note in my inbox:
I swear, I won’t be posting ALL conversations here, but this one interested the social psychology buff in me.

From: (username)
To: me
Date received: June 21, 2005
Subject: Hello

Hi, I thought your profile was really interesting for many reasons…

I reallly like to unwind over a microbrew(Warehouse, Bristol, or Phantom Canyon are some favs.) and good conversation or game of pool.

I’m the kind of guy who CANNOT control himself shoppin at Home Depot. Kind of a Tim Taylor thing, I guess.

I tend to be bold too. Which is why I’m replying…Hope to hear back from you.

username

That in and of itself isn’t anything special or out of the ordinary — just a nice note. BUT, when I read this guy’s profile, I found this:

Dating someone with children and an ‘EX’ hasn’t worked for me. Like Seinfeld says. “…Not that there’s anything wrong with that…” I honestly don’t think its good for the kids. I just don’t like those challenges right from the start. Sorry.

As it happens, there’s no ‘EX’ to deal with in my case — but there’s no way this guy would know that. So why the heck did he write to me? Maybe not a red flag, but definitely a yellow one. Here’s my response:

Hi — thanks for the note!

I’ll respond to more of your profile later, but
first wanted to bring up one part. You said

“Dating someone with children and an ‘EX’ hasn’t
worked for me. Like Seinfeld says. “…Not that
there’s anything wrong with that…” I honestly
don’t think its good for the kids. I just don’t
like those challenges right from the start.
Sorry.”

As it happens, my daughter’s bio father isn’t in
the picture in any way, shape, or form — but you
wouldn’t have known that. Why did you decide to
write anyway? I’m curious to know.

(And there I go being “bold” … heh, heh, heh.)

Allison

It’s entirely possible that I’ll never hear from this one again, and if so, I suppose I’ve learned something. If he does respond, I’ll be *very* curious to see what his reasoning for writing me was. Either I’m just *that* outstanding (but of course, dahling…LOL), or he doesn’t read.

On a lighter note, I got a response to my profile last night — the first one. Funny…pre-child, I would get maybe 5-10 emails per DAY when I first put up a profile. Now, I might get ONE every 5-10 days. That’s cool…much better to have the guys like that select themselves OUT.

From: (profile name)
To: me
Date received: June 20, 2005
Subject: Wow!

I have honestly never read a better profile!
-Matt

Awwwww. Yay! I’ve rewritten the “what I’m looking for” section…and I like what I did. I’d still like to revise the first part, but need to wait until it just comes to me. See my revised profile.

Sounds like an interesting guy, if a bit on the young side. He’d probably be fun to meet for a hike (in-town, busy location, of course) and chat. If nothing else, I’ll respond to say thanks.

:)